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Trying to qualify

January 19, 2012

I have not posted in a long time, mostly due to my upcoming qualifying exam. We are now on the eve of the theory section. As I look back on the past 18 months of graduate school, I realize how far I have come. While we constantly compare ourselves to others who are farther along, have more talent in particular areas, or simply work harder, we can forget that what really matters is whether we have improved or not. I definitely have. Graduate school has been the first time I’ve had to spend 6 months working on skills without any visible improvement. Then, without warning, comprehension strikes. 

I am hoping it strikes tomorrow. I have taken extreme efforts (including retaking my Theory 1 course) to prepare for tomorrow. If graduate school has taught me one thing, however, it is that persistence where you have previously failed is a valuable trait. Not only do obstacles tend to fall when you least expect them, but you gain respect from those around you. I think part of that respect comes from their knowledge that you would “stay in the trenches” with them were you to work together.

So, hopefully tomorrow will be a victory. If not, there will be a second chance in seven months. 

I am not afraid to fail.

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